Teenagers & Unconditional Love

I am on the hunt for some type of vitamin that will keep my Welansa from morphing into a TEENAGER. My hats go off to anyone who is parenting or have parented a teenager. I have watched my nephew morph from a sweet cuddly baby to a cranky and moody young man. I love my nephew but I wish I could put him in a time machine.

This weekend my family went to visit Kyle in CT. My sister had to attend a college seminar at his school. The boy is only in the 10th grade and we are talking about college. Oh my. I took Welansa to the Children’s Museum while my sister and mother attended the seminar.

Kyle had his own agenda but he was able to squeeze us into his schedule and we had dinner together on Saturday and brunch on Sunday. The only person he was happy to see in my opinion was Welansa of course. I often wonder why? I have finally figured it out. Welansa loves Kyle unconditionally. She loves the way God loves and who would not be attracted to that kind of love.
- Welansa does not care about his GPA.
- Welansa could care less about the college he attends. Hell he does not have to graduate from High School. She still loves him. (He had better graduate !!!)
- Welansa could care less that he is moody one minute and sweet the next. It’s a moment to her. She does not live in the past or the future she lives in the present.
- Welansa could care less about the stinky dorm room and the dirty clothes that have not been washed in weeks. (Big improvement from the last time, the clothes were clean, the dorm room on the other hand, well let’s just move on).
- Welansa could care less how many points he scored during his basketball game.
- Welansa could care less that he had to serve “Sunny D”. Kyle’s nickname for Sunday Detention.


(Kyle and his roommate Brandon)

Welansa could care less about ALL of things that people get on his nerves about. All she knows is this is the first person to take her out of her mother’s arms when we arrived at the airport. Kyle is the cousin that acts silly with her, throws her up in the air, shows her off to all of his friends, and sneaks her treats that I will not allow her to have. Welansa looks beyond Kyle’s exterior and can see sometimes what we often miss. So now I know why Kyle loves Welansa so much. The wise ones say it is the parent that teaches the child. However, I think they have it wrong in this situation. It was the child who taught the lesson on loving unconditionally.

Lions & Tigers & Bears Oh My

While cleaning out my pocketbook this morning guess what I found at the bottom?

ANIMAL CRACKERS!!!

Its official Welansa has taken over every part of my being. A women’s pocketbook is one of her most sacred possessions. Enter without asking and you could loose a limb. I guess parenthood changes things, my purse is no longer a sacred possession but a ZOO.

I would love to hear what’s in your purse (child related of course).

Valentines Day - My Birthday

Valentines Day was my Birthday. I turned 39 years old. I am happy that I have reached a point in my life where I want a Valentine but I don’t need a Valentine. Wants and needs are two different things.

My only request for my Birthday was a home cooked seafood feast with my three favorite girls, my mother, sister, and of course Welansa. Work has been extremely crazy and parenting a 2-½ year old can leave you exhausted. All I wanted to do was relax, eat, and have a nice glass of sangria.

Welansa attended church with my sister and mother so I dropped her off at the church and went back home. The goal was to nap for 45 minutes, finish dinner (I cook several meals on Sunday), get dressed, and then pick my mother and Welansa up from church when it ended. All I needed was 2 ½ hours. However, after 1 hour and 20 minutes, my mother was ready for me to pick her up. Of course I had an attitude because I still had rollers in my hair and I had not taken a shower. Who wants to look crazy on their Birthday?

I was starting to feel like a cab and a bit stressed. Since Welansa’s arrival I do my best to stay away from things and people that stress me out. Anything or anyone that is high maintenance sends me running in the opposite direction. The last thing I wanted to do was take my mother home, drive back to my house to get dressed and then drive back to my sister and mother’s house for dinner. The driving back and forth was starting to make this Birthday Seafood feast stressful.

My mother could tell I had an attitude and she was not having it. She gave me attitude right back. We went back and forth and basically I told her that if I took her home I would not be coming back. During our conversation or should I say disagreement Welansa made sure to add her two cents. She told her grandma “don’t talk to my mommy anymore” and then told me “don’t talk to my grandma anymore” so sad when a 2 ½ year old has to intercede. My mother and I looked at each other and laughed.

Long story short I took my mother home and went back to my house and never went back for my home cooked seafood feast. I spent the entire day in rollers and sweat pants chilling with Welansa. I kept waiting and hoping that my mother and sister would knock on my door with my b-day cake and seafood. That did not happen. So I called Dominos. Five minutes after I ordered, my Godson’s mother knocked on my door. She went to my sisters & mothers house to drop off my gift only I was not there. My mother prepared a doggy bag for me (fried shrimp, shrimp scampi, crab legs, and a backed potato), which included a slice of my birthday cake and sent it with my Godson’s mother. I can’t believe they ate and cut MY birthday cake without me.

I knew I had to make things right between my mother and I. That’s my girl and I can’t stand when we disagree with each other. So I walked in tonight with 4 Peanut Butter cups. My mother is easy to please. I handed her the peace offering and told her I was sorry. She gave me a big hug and kiss and we sat down to chat. She explained to me that she loves being with Welansa BUT she can be challenging at times. I understand what she is talking about. Welansa is very sweet but extremely stubborn, catches attitudes often, and can be a bit challenging. She like me does not have time for a lot of drama. She has to save her energy for helping care for Welansa. So Welansa is the common denominator. We both looked at each other and started laughing because neither one of us wants to deal with drama because we have to save our energy for Welansa. So I jokingly said to Welansa that she is causing problems in my relationship with my mother. Her response “no I not”. At the end of the day we both know it has nothing to do with Welansa.

I hope and pray that my relationship with Welansa is similar to the relationship I have with my mother. Life is a gift and we can’t spend our time and energy being upset with each other because that is my MOTHER and I am her DAUGHTER.

Sweet Memories of Carnival

I LOVE this video. It reminds of the days I spent attending various Caribbean Carnivals throughout the US. Miami Carnival is my favorite. Pre-Welansa I would leave NY on a Friday and return on a Tuesday. From the time I touched down until the time I left it was a big party. If I got 4 hours of sleep the entire weekend I was doing good. ALL of my time was spent dancing (winding down and flingin waist) and hanging with my friends. One summer I decided to attend as many Carnivals in the US as I could. I know crazy, crazy, crazy but I had lots of fun. Truth be told my old bones would not allow me to do that anymore :-).

Nick Jr.'s rendition of Mocho Jumbie

When the video comes on Welansa starts running around the room or moving her hips. The other day in circle time everyone was sitting down singing “BINGO” and she got up, put her hands on her hips, and started moving her waist.

My rendition of Mocho Jumbie.
I was at this concert acting a fool my legs hurt so bad after that concert.

During dinner I like to have some type of Ethiopian music playing. After dinner I turn the music up and we have our dance sessions. I am trying to learn some of the Ethiopian dances and moving the shoulders is a must. Between the moving of the waist (Caribbean side) and the shoulders (Ethiopian side) I think she will have some pretty good dance moves.

Her dance moves.

More dance moves.

My sister is thinking about having a 50th Birthday Party. I am sure Welansa’s God Parents will attend. They are Ethiopian and I am so blessed to have them in our lives. I have not seen all of the Ethiopian dances but from what I have seen they are kind of conservative. When my family parties, we play all types of music but once you start playing the Calypso and Soca it’s a wrap. The dance floor is packed, hips are moving, and people are jumping up waving their flags. I hope Kassahun and Abaynesh don’t have second thoughts about my family once they see the craziness :-). I am sure they won’t. I do plan on getting them an Ethiopian flag or shall I say “rag” so when the deejay says represent your country Welansa and her God Parents can represent Ethiopia.

She’s Back

Actually Welansa has been home for a while. My mother had some important business to take care of so they returned on 24th instead of the 30th. I missed her but honestly she could have stayed another week. That’s right I said it. I missed my girl dearly but I was starting to enjoy being childless. I slept later, took the express train instead of the local train, went out a few times, and cleaned, cleaned, cleaned. I use to be such a neat freak. However, all of my freakiness went out of the window once Welansa arrived.

Welansa had a blast in the ATL. Because she is the only girl she was soooo spoiled and loved. Her five cousins took excellent care of her. I truly believe that Welansa was meant to be in MY family. She fits right in. My brother’s boys are rough, high energy, sweet, stubborn and funny. Welansa has every one of these qualities. She loved trying to ride Rocky, the white Labrador. My brother had her outside almost everyday playing baseball, soccer and basketball. I was told she would come in the house looking like a “hot mess”. My mother was afraid that her cousins would be too aggressive for her. Her concerns were quickly put to rest. It was she who did the pushing and her cousins never pushed or hit her back. She even mouthed off at her 20 year old cousin Charles. He told her to brush her teeth and she said to him “calm down Charles, calm down”. Charles has a twin brother named John and she was able to tell them apart.

She had a blast. I am already making arrangements for her to spend 2 weeks in the summer !!!!!


(Welansa, and ALL of her cousins - Kyle, John, Charles, Akil, Amir, Asan)

Happy Anniversary

January 21, 2008, was the first time I met Welansa. Happy 2nd Year Anniversary.

Be Careful What You Wish For

On Tuesday evening after Welansa’s bath and getting her hair “did” I told her she would sleep with mommy tonight. She was super excited because co-sleeping is reserved for the weekends only. I average five hours of sleep per night. I need the five hours to be uninterrupted. I can’t tell you the number of times I have awaken with a foot or arm in my face. So co-sleeping is reserved for the weekends.

As soon as we got in the bed she said to me “mommy lay on me”. What she really meant was “mommy I lay one you”. Ever since Welansa was a little baby I would place her on my chest so she could hear my heartbeat as she feel asleep. I think she is getting too big to lie on top of mommy but I don’t have the heart to tell her no.

As she listened to my heartbeat I described to her what would happen tomorrow. I whispered in her ear and told her that she would be going to Grandma’s house for a couple of hours. Then I would pick her and grandma up and take them to the train station. I asked her to make the sound of a train. I then told her that she would spend sometime on the train playing with her toys and eating lots of snacks. At around 9pm she would fall asleep and when she woke up she would be in Atlanta, GA. Her uncle John would pick her up from the train station and take her to his house where she would see her auntie Akilah, her five cousins (John Jr. , Charles, Akil, Amir, and Asan), the dog (Rocky) and the cat (Yankee). I told her she would be gone for TWO WEEKS and that I loved her dearly, would never forget about her, and we would see each other soon. I gave her 3 kisses the Ethiopian way and we went to sleep.

Welansa is in Atlanta with my mother for two weeks. A couple of months ago I wished she could spend a week in GA with my brother and his family. However, things did not work out. I was told on Monday that my mother would be going to Atlanta on Wednesday and she wanted to take Welansa. My heart started racing, I started sweating underneath my arms and the room began to spin. Two weeks. That’s a long time. In my mind I knew that she would have a great time with her cousins and this would be the beginning of her forming a really close relationship with her uncle. As it stands he is the closest male figure in her life.

In my heart I knew I would miss her dearly. I am doing well. I have only cried twice and I am using my time wisely. I am taking care of myself and giving my apartment a good “winter” cleaning.

Praying for Haiti

Please keep all of the people affected by the earthquake in Haiti in your PRAYERS. I was reminded again today to shut up and stop complaining. I am so blessed. Someone in Haiti just lost a son, a daughter, a mother, a father, an aunt, an uncle, a cousin and a friend. Someone just lost their home, their job, or may be in need of medical assistance.

Today I contacted my friends who may have been affected by earthquake. Milian was an older gentleman who worked in my Department for a number of years. He was forced out of Haiti because of his political beliefs but continues to travel back and fourth to help those less fortunate in his country. His family in Haiti are fine but he can’t reach his childhood friend and part of his home collapsed.

Welansa and I went to check on the neighbors the Bobo’s. When the weather is nice Mrs. Bobo meets Welansa outside and walks her to the car. She loves Welansa dearly. All of her family members are fine.

My sister’s neighborhood has a high population of Haitians. When Welansa is outside in the yard she loves to greet people as they walk by. Tonight I can hear some of the Haitian neighbors speaking to Welansa with their French accents. “Hello darling have a good day”. I hope and pray the neighbors loved one are okay.

The Earthquake affected 1 out of every 3 people in Haiti.

HAITI YOU ARE IN MY PRAYERS

Mommy & Me Swim, Two Piece, & “AE” Herbal Tea

“It” had been on my task list long enough. The “it” was enrolling Welansa and I in a “Mommy & Me Swim Class”. I had my reasons for delaying the enrollment. The class starts at 8:30am on a Saturday morning (way to early for me) and who wants to go swimming and then afterwards step out into 30-degree weather (surely not me). Lately, Welansa has been all over the place so I figured the swim class which has a 30 minute gym session afterward would help her channel some of that energy in a more positive direction.

I enrolled in the class this week only to have a “light bulb” moment. I have never seen any of the mommy’s wearing a two-piece bathing suit in the class. Oh no. I don’t have a one-piece bathing suit. That’s right I said it. I still wear and love my two-piece bathing suits. Some are more scandalous than others. So now I have to find a one-piece bathing suit.

Now where does the “AE” herbal tea come into play? After I had Welansa, women would approach me and want to know my “secret”. “What secret? ” They wanted to know how I lost so much weight after “having” Welansa. According to them everything was where it should be, my stomach was still flat, and I still had my coke bottle figure. My response was an “AE” herbal tea I purchased from the health food store. I didn’t want to lie but I didn’t want to tell the entire truth. After all I don’t have to share how Welansa and I became a family to every stranger on the street.

AE herbal tea is not really a tea but a culmination of paperwork, money, emotions, and the greatest gift God could ever give me, Welansa. “AE” is ADOPTION ETHIOPIA. The adoption process kept me slim in trim between waiting, worrying, preparing, planning, decorating, shopping and all the other things associated with adoption I ate less or at times over ate. Most of the times I ate less but there were times when Chocolate Hagen Daz ice cream, puffy cheese doodles, Pepsi and I met in the kitchen for a late night rendezvous. One of the best things about adoption is the ability to keep everything tight and standing upright.

Well gotta go get me a one piece. But thank God for “AE” herbal tea, I can still wear my two-piece if I want to.

Grandma's Love/Happy Birthday

Only a Grandmother Would:


Watch Welansa from 7:15am – 7pm. While I am at work I have no worries about who is watching my child and what she is doing. I know she is safe, loved, spoiled, and well taken care of.

Purchase ALL of Welansa’s clothes once I got my referral. Everything from head to toe, barrettes and shoes included.

Organize all of her clothes before I left for Ethiopia. She was so meticulous about everything.

Make headbands because my girl did not have enough hair for barrettes. And my mother hand washed all of them when that got dirty

Make hand made hair bows. She loves to see little girls with pretty bows in their hair. My mother had never made a bow before but she learned. Welansa has all different colors. And my mother hand washes all of them when they get dirty.

Stay with me for 2 weeks after I returned from Ethiopia. She wanted to bond with Welansa and give me an opportunity to rest.

Takes care of Welansa even though she spends a lot of time in pain (degenerative arthritis). Her daily prayer is to give her the strength to take care of Welansa. I have tried to make other daycare arrangements but my mother is not having it.

Convert the porch area into Welansa’s play/learning room. The room is decorated with all types of educational posters, toys, games, etc. She spares no expense when it comes to purchasing learning material.

Take her passion for learning and education and TEACH my daughter. Welansa knows almost every fruit, counts to 20, knows her ABC’s, can receipt almost 12 Nursery Rhymes, recognizes almost all of letters, knows a lot of her shapes, etc, etc.

Remove the hem from 10 pair of pants for Welansa. These were the same pants my mother so graciously hemmed without a sewing machine 7 months ago. Not only did she take the hem out but she ironed out the crease and used spray starch. I had not idea people still use starch.

Purchase all of Welansa’s church clothes including the patent leather shoes and Rothschild coat. My mother loves taking Welansa to church. She wants her to look a certain way. The other day my mother told me to go upstairs and pick out a dress for Welansa. I opened the closet door and found several dresses and all of the dresses had a matching sweater, socks, and hair bow.

Be so supportive of me being a single mom. From day one my mother told me that on the days she baby sits I don’t have to dress Welansa or pack her breakfast or lunch. She will take care of it. Rarely have I taken her up on her offer because I like dressing Welansa in the morning. But it is a testament to her never-ending support.

Offers her time, energy, and support if she senses I am stressed out and feeling tired.

The list could go on and on. The reality is parenting is a little easier because I have my mom’s support. She loves Welansa to the core. Welansa is her only granddaughter and the only grandchild she sees often.

On January 7th, 60 something years ago God created an awesome mother and grandmother. Mommy thanks for EVERYTHING and Happy Birthday.

The Same Age

For the next couple of months my brother and I are the same age. Yes it’s possible. I was born in February and my brother the month of December. Most people think we are twins. We have always been in the same grade but separate classrooms. We have been roommates and college buddies.

Perhaps this is why we are so close and I chose him as my travel buddy when I went to Ethiopia. When I think about my brother it reminds me of our trip to Ethiopia. It was the first time in over 15 years I had him all to myself. I am reminded that I am blessed to have him as a brother and a friend.

Our trip to Ethiopia reminded me that my brother still does not plan properly. Five hours before our flight and we are at Wal-Mart picking up last minute travel items. We had planned the trip over 2 months ago.

Our trip to Ethiopia reminded me that my brother is extremely laid back and takes life as it comes. Emirates Airlines misplaced his luggage for 2 days. He made the best of it and didn’t complain.

Our trip to Ethiopia reminded me of the days we use to share a bedroom and the same bed. This came in handy because the guesthouse overbooked their rooms and my brother and I had to share a bed and a bedroom.

Our trip to Ethiopia reminded me that I still like to hover and worry about my little brother who is now a grown man. He loved Ethiopia and would often leave the guesthouse and take long walks. I was worried he would get lost.

Our trip to Ethiopia reminded me that my brother is still a comedian. John was getting dressed and on his way to a coffee shop. I was taking a shower when all of sudden the showerhead broke and water began to gush out of the fixture. I did not want to get the floor wet so I used my hand as a stopper. I asked John to help me but he said he was on his way out so he would stop by the desk and have them send someone up to help me out. But I don’t have any clothes on I shouted. He said, “oh well” and started laughing. Finally, he took his clothes off and we switched places. I called the front desk and a man came with a machete. That was even funnier.

Our trip to Ethiopia reminded me that my brother is not afraid to stand up for what is right. While in a shopping center my brother saw a shop owner swinging a stick at some young children who were begging for money and food. Let’s just say by the time it was over the shopkeeper understood a little bit of English. Simply put he was not going to mistreat any children in front of my brother.

Our trip to Ethiopia reminded me that my brother is a kind and giving soul. While in Dire Dawa a young boy asked my brother to buy a pack of tissue. My brother bought the tissue and gave the young man (Abdey) a ride before we made our way to lunch. Abdey’s home was a street corner his family lost their home in a flood. He sold tissues to support his mother, sister, and brother. As we drove off my brother said to our guide (Ephrim) and myself that we would not eat until Abdey and his family ate. So off to the market we went. We picked up some food and brought it back to Abdey and his family. While eating lunch my brother asked Ephrim how much it would cost to get the family an apartment. About $35 a month, that’s all my brother needed to know. It’s been two years and let’s just say Abdey and his family no longer live on the street, have plenty of food to eat, and Abdey no longer sells tissue. He has been instructed to go to school and care for his family.

John, Abdey, and Ephrim


John playing with the children in the orphanage

Our trip to Ethiopia reminded me that no matter how close we are we still fight and get on each other nerves. What were we fighting over or shall I say who? Welansa of course. Because both of us wanted to hold her we fought all the time about whose turn it was to hold her.

Christmas 2009

Christmas 2009 was relaxing and spent with family. Just the way I like it!!
Lately I have been bombarded with annoying sounds. I am not sure what I find more irritating at this point the Elmo CD we play in the car EVERY day or the mindless noisy car that transforms into a robot. None of which are items that I purchased. Thus, I made sure that every toy I purchased this year was quiet and served a purpose. Now if only Welansa would stop hogging the CD player and allow me to listen to Mary J Blige’s new joint my ears could have some relief.






Mr. Potato Head was a big hit this Christmas. He sure has changed. The one I purchased came with a carrying case, earrings, and various feet and hats to choose from.


The Classic Mr. Potato Head

Mr. Potato Head with Carrying Case

Joke of the Day

Welansa - Mommy I like your hair
Mommy - Thank you Welansa
Welansa - Where it come from? The store?
Mommy - Some of it does

I Made It

My last post stated that I was taking a few days off to take care of myself and I did just that. On Thursday, I slept late and then took Welansa to the sitter. After dropping her off I went to the nail salon to get an ever so needed pedicure, manicure, and eyebrow waxing. I was starting to feel like a new woman. After my visit at the nail salon I did some major shopping. I was in need of everything FALL/ WINTER. I found some really cute hats, sweaters, and belts. I had the hardest time finding a pair of pants. Jebena I did manage to take a picture of the belts and hat I purchased.

I am ever so grateful I did take two days off. God knew that I would need the days to build up my strength to get through the next couple of weeks. About 3 weeks ago I went to my new General Manager and asked if she needed assistance on a certain project. Her response to me was “sure please take care of the project for me”. Okay. I met with her to go over the section I volunteered to assist her with only to find out that I would now be responsible for the ENTIRE project.

Some people asked why in the world would I volunteer my services. My response was “I know what I am doing”. One, I have worked in the same position now for 10 years and special projects allow me to put a little spice in my professional life. Two, I leave everyday at 5pm and rarely do I work over 40 hours. All the other Directors work more than 40 hours, however, none of them have children. Third, the new GM needed to know my work ethic. Although she had already heard about me she had never seen me in action. Fourth, she needed to know that I will work late and weekends if I have to, however, it will not happen on a normal basis.

The project was a huge success and now the new GM is very familiar with how I handle projects. And I received a cash bonus and 4 Jet Blue airline tickets. I learned a very valuable lesson during this project and I know why I have not made an issue to seek employment elsewhere. I learned that I do not want an extremely demanding job. During this project there were some days I saw Welansa 1 – 2 hours in a day. It broke my heart. There were nights that I would rush home to put her to bed so I could do some extra work at home. And on Sunday I had to take her to work with me so I could work on setup. My staff has worked for me for a while so rarely do I get calls at home. I have always empowered them to think and make decisions for themselves. It has paid off. After 5pm I don’t think about my J-O-B.

Welansa accompanying me to work was actually fun. I worked with the Operations Staff. It was kind of funny seeing these young guys with lots of tattoos and earrings in their ear playing with Welansa and trying to teach Welansa how to dance salsa.

Just when I thought the excitement was over. My brother, his wife, and five children came to New York for Thanksgiving. My first question was “where are you staying?” With you and Welansa he replied. My apartment was a mess because of the special project but I managed to pull it together and Welansa enjoyed the time with her cousins

During the visit I wanted to take a picture of all of the cousins. I had been waiting for this moment since I bought Welansa home. Be careful of what you wish for. Trying to get 6 boys and 1 girl to be still so I could take a picture was a hot mess. Let’s just say it did not turn out so great. I would love to post the picture but my brother does not want his children’s picture on the net. Oh well.

Now Christmas is here and I have not done a thing except attempt to take pictures of Welansa in her Christmas dress. That was another hot mess. The child can’t be still!!!



STUFF FROM MY SHOPPING SPREE

FEELING LIKE BRENDA AGAIN

HURRY UP PLEASE

HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO SAY "CHEESE"

I'M OUT OF HERE!!

Gettin My "Fly" Back

I finally had to break down and take some time off. It was needed. Five hours of sleep, rushing every morning to get to work late, Welansa, and the job had my head spinning. I am off for the rest of the week and will return to work on Monday. I am super excited. I started my mental health staycation by picking up some much craved Ethiopian Food. I picked Welansa up from the sitter and went to my mom's house to eat dinner. I was too tired to make Welansa a plate so she sat on my lap and we devoured our sambusa and doro wat.

After dinner we played for a while and then I brushed her teeth and put her in the bed. I am guilty of letting the TV baby sit tonight because when I left she was watching Dora. Oh well at least she will learn to speak Spanish. I gave my mom the peace sign and headed towards the door. She joked with me and said “your child is not sleep where are you going?” I said "it takes a village to raise a child and when I received my referral for Welansa I never said I have a baby I said we have a baby so I’m out!!!” We started laughing. Back in the day if I took the day off she stayed with me.

Not this time. Mama needs a break. A friend of mine said “B what’s up? I can tell you have a baby now.” I asked him what he meant by that statement although I already knew the answer. He said “ you still look fly BUT”. He need not say anymore. Five hours of sleep leaves me with circles under my eyes, 20 minutes for makeup and hair is not cutting it, and the fact that I have not hit the mall in a while because shopping with a 2 year old is not fun has caught up to me.

So I have to get my “fly” back. I am going to sleep late, get a pedicure, and do some shopping. I’ll show him!!!

Complicated ??Questions?? Already !!!

I thought I had time but obviously not. Now I have to re-organize myself and update my task list. I knew it would happen and I am okay and totally comfortable with the ?question?. But I did not think my 2 year and 5 month old daughter would ask so soon. This is what I get for letting my mother be the babysitter. My mother is not a babysitter but a teacher.

Last week's lesson plan must have been "family" because Welansa started naming the different members in a family. She pointed to her "family wall" and said "mother, father, brother, sister, auntie, uncle". The "family wall" consists of pictures of her grandmother, godparents, cousins, aunts, uncle, and two siblings (the cats).

She knows the name of every person/animal on the wall. In her mind everyone was accounted for except for the "FATHER". So in true Welansa fashion my girl says to me "mommy where is daddy?". I wanted to say that right now your daddy (Idris Elba) is dating someone else. He has yet to meet me, fall madly in love, and ask me to marry him so he can be your daddy. Okay back to reality.

For 30 seconds I sat there in shock. According to my calculations she is asking me this question way too early and I am not prepared. Oh well let me give it my best shot. I explained to Welansa that there were different types of families. Some families have a mommy, daddy, and children. Some families have a mommy and children, and some families have a daddy and children. In your family you have a mommy, an uncle, a grandma, aunties, cousins, two cats, and godparents and they love you very much. You have a godfather who plays the role of a father and he is going to teach you to speak Amharic too. She said "okay".

Welansa loves story time so I am going to order some children’s books on growing up in a single parent home. If you have any other suggestions or books to recommend please let me know.

SINGLE PARENTING BOOKS







Also, I have been meaning to purchase some children's books on adoption.

ADOPTION BOOKS FOR CHILDREN

Pumpkin Patch Fun & Trick or Treat

Welansa was a GOOD witch.






Time sure does fly when your having fun. This was Welansa LAST year.

PUMPKIN PATCH FUN

I Know I Shouldn’t Have But I Did.

Frankly I was tired of:

*The wheels on the bus going round and round (I was starting to get dizzy)
*The itsy bitsy spider going up the water spout (doesn’t he get tired)
*Old McDonald on his farm. (how about Old McDonald goes to the zoo)
*B-I-N-G-O the dog (I am sure at this point Bingo knows his name)
*Rowing the boat down the stream (let’s just get in the car and go)
*Being happy and you know and having to show it. (The smile on face is not enough?)

I have done my very best to ensure that the music in the car is age appropriate. I have a CD of children’s song just for baby girl. However, on this particular morning I needed a boost. I needed a song with a hype beat. SO I DID IT. I reached over and pressed “4” on the radio and one of my favorite songs “Empire State of Mind” by Jay Z was playing on the radio. I know, I know, I shouldn’t have but I had to. Once I heard the chorus:

New York, I'm becomin' where dreams are made of
There's nothin' you can't do
out of New York
These streets will make you feel brand new
Big lights will inspire you
Let's hear it for New York, New York,
New York

It was a wrap there was no turning back I could not turn the station. So I did it. I opened the sunroof, turned the music up so I could feel the beat, moved my head to the rhythm, and enjoyed the song. When I looked in my rear view mirror Welansa was moving her head too.

I carried this indiscretion around for about a week. I mean how could I? But then I found out that “Empire State of Mind” has become the theme song for Yankee Playoff Series. Now Jay Z and fellow New Yorker Alicia Keys will perform the song at
Game 2 of the World Series and I can’t forget the 911 Benefit Concert Jay Z did. All of the proceeds went to the New York Police and Fire Widows’ Children’s Fund.

Well, perhaps I can stop feeling so darn guilty.

Family & Friends Weekend

Welansa enjoyed seeing her cousin this weekend. As soon as she saw Kyle she smiled and ran into his arms. I could tell they both missed each other. Not sure why I brought a stroller because Kyle carried her around the entire time. I believe he was using my Welansa in order to get attention from the girls. It was evident that Welansa made Kyle very popular with the young ladies. Welansa even sat on his lap for some of the classes. The teachers didn’t mind.

I had a chance to sit in on a few of Kyle’s classes. Boy does this stuff bring back memories. Welansa and Kyle had a busy class schedule.

Art – She sat on Kyle's lap the entire time, ate an apple, and drew a picture.
Chemistry – She feel asleep. I guess she had enough of the periodic table.
Algebra – She decided to count from 1 – 20 in the middle of the class.
English – The teacher was writing on the board with some colorful markers and Welansa decided she wanted one. The conversation went like this:
Welansa – Mommy I want markers
Mommy – Shh. The teacher is talking
Welansa – Mommy I wants markers
Mommy – The teacher needs her markers
Welansa – I go ask her
Mommy – Okay
Welansa gets off of my lap, walks to the front of the room, taps the teacher on her leg, and says “I want marker, please” Who could resist that face so the teacher gave her a marker and sat her in front of the class while she drew a picture. What confidence !!!

Boarding School is a lot of responsibility and requires children to be very independent. I imagine that most parents miss their children. Would you allow your child to attend boarding school?

Kyle was home schooled by my mother for the 1st part of elementary school. He has always been advanced academically so when he transferred into a regular school setting he acted a fool. He corrected the teachers if they used improper English, cracked jokes, talked all the time because he already knew the material, and did not apply himself. He needed to be challenged. Now he is among his peers and has no time to be acting a fool. Although I was told that he is still correcting his teachers and on most occasions has been right in his corrections.


Welansa & Kyle in English Class

Welansa in Math Class

Missing Her Cousin

Almost everyday Welansa asks about her cousin Kyle. The conversation goes like this EVERYTIME. The script never changes.

Welansa – Mommy where is Kyle?
Me – Kyle is at school in CT
Welansa – With his friends?
Me – Yes Welansa with he friends

Welansa – Mommy where is Auntie Roz?
Me – Auntie Roz is at work
Welansa – With her co-workers?
Me – Yes Welansa with her co-workers.

I am not sure how she goes from Kyle to Auntie Roz. Auntie Roz is Kyle’s mother. This weekend is Family Weekend at Kyle’s boarding school so tomorrow I am going to surprise Welansa and take her to CT to see her cousin. She is going to be so happy. I am taking the Amtrak (wish me luck with this trip) and riding home with my sister who is leaving today.