Be Careful What You Wish For

On Tuesday evening after Welansa’s bath and getting her hair “did” I told her she would sleep with mommy tonight. She was super excited because co-sleeping is reserved for the weekends only. I average five hours of sleep per night. I need the five hours to be uninterrupted. I can’t tell you the number of times I have awaken with a foot or arm in my face. So co-sleeping is reserved for the weekends.

As soon as we got in the bed she said to me “mommy lay on me”. What she really meant was “mommy I lay one you”. Ever since Welansa was a little baby I would place her on my chest so she could hear my heartbeat as she feel asleep. I think she is getting too big to lie on top of mommy but I don’t have the heart to tell her no.

As she listened to my heartbeat I described to her what would happen tomorrow. I whispered in her ear and told her that she would be going to Grandma’s house for a couple of hours. Then I would pick her and grandma up and take them to the train station. I asked her to make the sound of a train. I then told her that she would spend sometime on the train playing with her toys and eating lots of snacks. At around 9pm she would fall asleep and when she woke up she would be in Atlanta, GA. Her uncle John would pick her up from the train station and take her to his house where she would see her auntie Akilah, her five cousins (John Jr. , Charles, Akil, Amir, and Asan), the dog (Rocky) and the cat (Yankee). I told her she would be gone for TWO WEEKS and that I loved her dearly, would never forget about her, and we would see each other soon. I gave her 3 kisses the Ethiopian way and we went to sleep.

Welansa is in Atlanta with my mother for two weeks. A couple of months ago I wished she could spend a week in GA with my brother and his family. However, things did not work out. I was told on Monday that my mother would be going to Atlanta on Wednesday and she wanted to take Welansa. My heart started racing, I started sweating underneath my arms and the room began to spin. Two weeks. That’s a long time. In my mind I knew that she would have a great time with her cousins and this would be the beginning of her forming a really close relationship with her uncle. As it stands he is the closest male figure in her life.

In my heart I knew I would miss her dearly. I am doing well. I have only cried twice and I am using my time wisely. I am taking care of myself and giving my apartment a good “winter” cleaning.