Valentines Day - My Birthday

Valentines Day was my Birthday. I turned 39 years old. I am happy that I have reached a point in my life where I want a Valentine but I don’t need a Valentine. Wants and needs are two different things.

My only request for my Birthday was a home cooked seafood feast with my three favorite girls, my mother, sister, and of course Welansa. Work has been extremely crazy and parenting a 2-½ year old can leave you exhausted. All I wanted to do was relax, eat, and have a nice glass of sangria.

Welansa attended church with my sister and mother so I dropped her off at the church and went back home. The goal was to nap for 45 minutes, finish dinner (I cook several meals on Sunday), get dressed, and then pick my mother and Welansa up from church when it ended. All I needed was 2 ½ hours. However, after 1 hour and 20 minutes, my mother was ready for me to pick her up. Of course I had an attitude because I still had rollers in my hair and I had not taken a shower. Who wants to look crazy on their Birthday?

I was starting to feel like a cab and a bit stressed. Since Welansa’s arrival I do my best to stay away from things and people that stress me out. Anything or anyone that is high maintenance sends me running in the opposite direction. The last thing I wanted to do was take my mother home, drive back to my house to get dressed and then drive back to my sister and mother’s house for dinner. The driving back and forth was starting to make this Birthday Seafood feast stressful.

My mother could tell I had an attitude and she was not having it. She gave me attitude right back. We went back and forth and basically I told her that if I took her home I would not be coming back. During our conversation or should I say disagreement Welansa made sure to add her two cents. She told her grandma “don’t talk to my mommy anymore” and then told me “don’t talk to my grandma anymore” so sad when a 2 ½ year old has to intercede. My mother and I looked at each other and laughed.

Long story short I took my mother home and went back to my house and never went back for my home cooked seafood feast. I spent the entire day in rollers and sweat pants chilling with Welansa. I kept waiting and hoping that my mother and sister would knock on my door with my b-day cake and seafood. That did not happen. So I called Dominos. Five minutes after I ordered, my Godson’s mother knocked on my door. She went to my sisters & mothers house to drop off my gift only I was not there. My mother prepared a doggy bag for me (fried shrimp, shrimp scampi, crab legs, and a backed potato), which included a slice of my birthday cake and sent it with my Godson’s mother. I can’t believe they ate and cut MY birthday cake without me.

I knew I had to make things right between my mother and I. That’s my girl and I can’t stand when we disagree with each other. So I walked in tonight with 4 Peanut Butter cups. My mother is easy to please. I handed her the peace offering and told her I was sorry. She gave me a big hug and kiss and we sat down to chat. She explained to me that she loves being with Welansa BUT she can be challenging at times. I understand what she is talking about. Welansa is very sweet but extremely stubborn, catches attitudes often, and can be a bit challenging. She like me does not have time for a lot of drama. She has to save her energy for helping care for Welansa. So Welansa is the common denominator. We both looked at each other and started laughing because neither one of us wants to deal with drama because we have to save our energy for Welansa. So I jokingly said to Welansa that she is causing problems in my relationship with my mother. Her response “no I not”. At the end of the day we both know it has nothing to do with Welansa.

I hope and pray that my relationship with Welansa is similar to the relationship I have with my mother. Life is a gift and we can’t spend our time and energy being upset with each other because that is my MOTHER and I am her DAUGHTER.